Making Friends with Your Inner Critic

We all have an Inner Critic, an Inner Crazy Lady. Make friends with yours because she is trying to keep you safe

We all have an Inner Critic

Many coaches advocate giving her a name on the premise of “keep your enemies close” Often these are the names of bullies or “Crazy Ladies” like Maleficent, Miss Trunchball, Estelle, Cruella, Ursula ………….

Mine is Fanny-Anne

When the nasty negative thoughts come the first step is to sit with the unpleasantness. Ask yourself “Why am I feeling like this?” and make the realisation that it is just your Inner Crazy Lady. 

Fanny-Anne in full flow!

Your Crazy Lady often appears to keep you safe when you are on the verge of a big shift forwards, as they say, “The devil is in the next level” 

Disempowering your Crazy Lady

Your Inner Critic is just white noise, a negative tape loop. By conversing with Fanny Anne and learning to dance with her when she pops her ugly head up, I can disassociate from her and disempower her. It is also a great idea to send your Crazy Lady on a short holiday (a long way away with perhaps a one-way ticket!)

“Thank you, Fanny, for your thought that I am a useless parent, but I know the truth to be that I am a great parent doing the very best I can, so I send that thought back to you with love and hope you enjoy your quiet break” 

So that is “Fanny”, my Crazy Lady! What about yours? Is it a woman or maybe you have a Crazy Man? Is it a particular voice, someone you know already?

Name her before you shame her

The first step is to give your “Crazy Lady” a name and an identity and do feel free to make it humorous.

Then get close to her. It is a good idea to create a Crazy Lady Chatter Log list of where your Crazy Lady rears her ugly head in all areas of your life, and what you think the triggers are like whenever I am tired, or when my sister does something which makes me think she is better than me, when the end of the month is coming, and I am broke etc

When does she appear? What does your Crazy Lady say? How aware are you of it?

This can feel uncomfortable but remember there is no judgment on your thoughts or reactions – if we capture the facts, we know what we are dealing with!

The next blog covers How to Deal with your Inner Critic, how to Ditch the Bitch!

Getting To Know Your Inner Critic is part of the 6 Proven Steps to Connecting Heartfully

Wendy xxx

The Heartfulness Coach

PS – If you are critical of yourself over a difficult relationship try my FREE CONFLICT TO CALM
Video Masterclass,
in which I share strategies and tips that I found invaluable
when dealing with my own Troubled Teen. I know they will help with any Tricky
Relationship. 
Click here to get it delivered to your inbox.

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